The Eight Commandments of Dating
Finally, after a year of mending a broken heart, you come out of your shell and announce to your friends that you are ready to meet other people.
However, after several years of having a steady date, you find yourself feeling eerie going back to dating. Itís like youíre clueless. You canít recall what your first date like with your ex- partner (or you intend not to recall). And you really want to make it right this time.
At the midst of your apprehension, your friend calls you and excitedly announced to you that she got you a date. She talks nonstop about how gorgeous this guy is and went on to endless list of this guyís achievement and best features. Meanwhile, your thoughts had drifted to your many anxieties on having your first date ever after a major break-up.
You are afraid that you might screw it up. That the guy may not be as good as your former. That you will be tongue-tied the entire time you are together. Perhaps, you may never have any thing to say to him. That you might become a lousy date. Or you are never really be prepared on going back to the dating game yet.
Donít fret. You are not alone. Many have gone through the jitters too. And it is usual. Donít be too hard on yourself by backing out just because you fell like you canít make it. Itís just a matter of knowing what to avoid to make your date click.
Here are the EIGHT COMMANDMENTS OF DATING to the rescue.
1. Thou shall not be late
Do all the necessary preparations ahead of time. I suggest that a night before the big day, choose your outfit already. So, that you wonít hurry dressing up for your date. You donít want your partner to see you wearing the wrong pair of earrings. Make sure that when your guy knocks on your door, you are all set. Cramming is one disaster risk factor. So, be careful not to cram. Having your date stand for 10 minutes on your day will not create a nice impression.
2. Thou shall not narrate break-up history on thy date.
For Godís sake donít do this. You are supposed to have fun and not sour grape over your most recent break-up. And besides, past is past, bury them all on the ground and start anew. Your date is suppose to be a new prospect, not a shock absorber. Your friends have that role already. Instead of dwelling in the past, know this new guy in front of you more. Ask him about his stuff like - what he does, his kind of sports, hobbies, interests and more until such time you arrive at your common interest. Little do you know, that you have been talking for three hours straight and enjoying every minute of it.
3. Thou shall not be tongue- tied
Donít let your date ask you where your mouth is because you cannot think of anything to say. Or thereís something wrong with you because your answers are all monosyllables. Let him get to know you better. Tell him what you do on your work, on your free time, your favorite activities, sports and stuff. You can initiate a conversation to impress him more. Men want their women to be witty and sensible.
4. Thou shall not compare
The man in front of you is totally a different individual. It will be unfair to pattern him to your previous guy or make a note of comparison. What you should do is discover this new person in front of you and forget the past guy even his name if you wish to. Comparison as your standards will not put you anywhere. It will just make your date a disaster. And please, do not dare verbalize your notes of comparison with your date.
5. Thou shall not come in thy worst appearance.
Hey, you are dating because you want to hook up with the right guy this time. So, you have to create a good impression. Donít make your date run away from you because you look like youíve come from another planet with your dress, havenít taken a bath for days and smell like garbage. Be on your best attire. Look good and smell fresh. That way, you can captivate his attention the entire time you are together. And heíll be proud of you as a date.
6. Thou shall not be silly.
The worst thing you can be is looking silly. Do not talk things as if youíre a pro if in reality you are clueless. You would end up saying the wrong things that will confuse your date a lot. Look smart. If you happen to be unaware of what heís saying about the sports hockey, ask him questions. He will even be amused because you are paying interest on what he is talking about.
7. Thou shall not be aloof
Guys will be uncomfortable if they notice that their date seems to be aloof with them. Remember, it is both your first time to see each other. So, he is equally nervous about your date. Donít make him feel more nervous by being distant. Let him feel that you intend to enjoy the night with him. Be friendly enough to give him your sweet smile. Donít give him a cold shoulder. If he feels that you welcome his presence, heíd be motivated to ask you for another date.
8. Thou shall not be nervous
Donít worry too much on having a great date instead enjoy your date. If you feel nervous, youíre most likely to shake. It will be embarrassing if your date caught you holding a glass shaking. Donít be over powered with his presence. Show him you can manage yourself well. Be confident. Look straight in his eyes when you answer his questions. Flash your best smile. Amuse him with your wits and looks. Guys love women who are empowered.
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